dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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