Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
