Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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