I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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