Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
