Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Just cropdusted the office
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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