so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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