Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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