Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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