Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
