The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
