That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He better not be in your backpack
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
