Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
What changed your mind?
Being sober
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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