I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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