I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
