I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
