Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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