I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
