You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
