David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize