New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
