I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
