Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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