giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize