whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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