why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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