i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
