Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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