Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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