You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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