so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
