You're completely useless in the revolution.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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