I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
