is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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