when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
