at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
