If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
