Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
