i'm signing you up for texting rehab
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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