To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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