She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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