Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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