I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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