Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
