oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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