This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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