you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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