ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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