I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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