is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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